The Onion Movie

May 31, 2008

1h 20m

★ 6.1

America's Finest News Source.

Overview

Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.

Genres

Comedy

Production Companies

The Onion

The Onion Movie Trailers

Cast

Norm Archer

Len Cariou

Cock Puncher

Steven Seagal

Dana Dobbs

Larissa Laskin

Sensei

Ken Takemoto

Dennis McCormick

Don McManus

Michael Bolton

Ahmed

Ahmed Ahmed

White Black Guy Tim

Brendan Fletcher

Ivy Leaguer

Daniel Dae Kim

Cooking Show Chef

Meredith Baxter

Wizard Proteus

Jed Rees

Rodney Dangerfield

When the nefarious Dark Helmet hatches a plan to snatch Princess Vespa and steal her planet's air, space-bum-for-hire Lone Starr and his clueless sidekick fly to the rescue. Along the way, they meet Yogurt, who puts Lone Starr wise to the power of "The Schwartz." Can he master it in time to save the day?

4.9

Rumours

Jul 1, 2024

En route to the annual G7 summit, the seven leaders of the world’s wealthiest liberal democracies get lost in the woods and face increasing peril while attempting to draft a provisional statement regarding a global crisis.

0.0

Guille Aquino Presidente

Dec 26, 2021

No overview available.

7.7

Urinetown

Sep 20, 2001

In the not-so-distant future, a terrible water shortage and 20-year drought has led to a government ban on private toilets and a proliferation of paid public toilets, owned and operated by a single megalomaniac company: the Urine Good Company. If the poor don’t obey the strict laws prohibiting free urination, they’ll be sent to the dreaded and mysterious “Urinetown.” After too long under the heel of the malevolent Caldwell B. Cladwell, the poor stage a revolt, led by a brave young hero, fighting tooth and nail for the freedom to pee “wherever you like, whenever you like, for as long as you like, and with whomever you like.”

7.3

Nashville

Jun 11, 1975

The intersecting stories of twenty-four characters—from country star to wannabe to reporter to waitress—connect to the music business in Nashville, Tennessee.

6.9

Dogma

Oct 4, 1999

An abortion clinic worker with a special heritage is called upon to save the existence of humanity from being negated by two renegade angels trying to exploit a loophole and reenter Heaven.

0.0

KAPPA

Aug 30, 2024

In the fake world of stardom, actor 'KAPPA' portrays a loving person and father figure when he plays the starring role in a lighthearted TV sit-com and when he presents himself in the media. His fake identity is juxtaposed with his egomaniac and perverse self which gradually unfolds until his soon to be demise.

7.4

Office Space

Feb 19, 1999

A depressed white-collar worker tries hypnotherapy, only to find himself in a perpetual state of devil-may-care bliss that prompts him to start living by his own rules, and hatch a hapless attempt to embezzle money from his soul-killing employers.

5.2

Found Footage Festival Volume 7: Live in Asheville

Mar 7, 2014

This special 10th anniversary edition of the Found Footage Festival finds curators Joe Pickett and Nick Prueher in a nostalgic mood, delving deeper--perhaps too deep--into some of their favorite VHS finds from over years. But Volume 7 is also jam packed with newly unearthed treasures, featuring singing rabbis, petulant news anchors, coughing snake handlers, bodybuilding clowns, and two body parts never before seen in the festival! It's a celebration of a decade of Found. Record over and you'll die! Taped live at The Grey Eagle in Asheville, North Carolina.

0.0

Piff the Magic Dragon: Reptile Dysfunction

Jul 1, 2022

Filmed at the Piff the Magic Dragon Theatre at the Flamingo Casino and on location in and around Las Vegas, this is Piff's debut hour starring Mr Piffles, Jade Simone, Francis the Squire and Penn Jillette as Pop the Magic Dragon.

0.0

Massimamente folle

Mar 3, 1983

The film presents a series of unrelated "pictures": a police commissioner who, faced with four friars stripped by two women, must decide whether they are real or false friars (but he can't); a professor who, suffering from acute dysentery, is dismissed for unworthiness by the Institute Council; a football referee trying to escape the ire of angry fans; an endless marathon in Piazza Navona; a true but crazy producer, a not crazy but fake producer and a group of actors who want to take revenge on one and the other; a "club of toasts" that spends its time toasting to this and that, to elect new members and honorary members; finally, a censorship commission that, aboard an old and very battered car, fails to reach his workplace.

7.7

Brazil

Feb 20, 1985

Low-level bureaucrat Sam Lowry escapes the monotony of his day-to-day life through a recurring daydream of himself as a virtuous hero saving a beautiful damsel. Investigating a case that led to the wrongful arrest and eventual death of an innocent man instead of wanted terrorist Harry Tuttle, he meets the woman from his daydream, and in trying to help her gets caught in a web of mistaken identities, mindless bureaucracy and lies.

No Image Available

0.0

Natasha Mail Order Bribe Escape to America

Jun 15, 2012

Ever since she was a little girl, growing up in the fourth world country of Crapistan, Natasha has devoured all things American. Finally, through the wonders of the Internet, she finds her way to a Bel Air mansion and into the loving arms of a socially inept Internet mogul. With her own "How to Be an American" scrapbook as a guide, every week, Natasha, the upbeat optimist, takes on a new, impossible challenge with wide-eyed enthusiasm.

7.4

Adam's Apples

Apr 15, 2005

A neo-nazi sentenced to community service at a church clashes with the blindly devotional priest.

6.4

Scary Movie

Jul 7, 2000

A familiar-looking group of teenagers find themselves being stalked by a more-than-vaguely recognizable masked killer! As the victims begin to pile up and the laughs pile on, none of your favorite scary movies escape the razor-sharp satire of this outrageously funny parody!

6.2

Eat the Rich

Oct 23, 1987

Alex is a disgruntled waiter at a snobby exclusive restaurant who falls on hard times. Forced to deal with the contempt and disgust of the upper class, Alex & cohorts attempt to go on a rampage. Meanwhile, General Karprov and Spider plot to involve the inept anarchists into their plans to derail the prime-minister-to-be's campaign.

5.8

Charlie's Angels

Nov 2, 2000

The captivating crime-fighting trio who are masters of disguise, espionage and martial arts are back! When a devious mastermind embroils them in a plot to destroy individual privacy, the Angels, aided by their loyal sidekick Bosley, set out to bring down the bad guys. But when a terrible secret is revealed, it makes the Angels targets for assassination.