Don't Touch the White Woman!

Jan 23, 1974

1h 48m

★ 5.5

Overview

A highly stylized surreal farce about the events leading up to Custer's Last Stand anachronistically reenacted in an urban renewal area in modern Paris.

Genres

Comedy

Western

Production Companies

Mara Films

Films 66

Don't Touch the White Woman! Trailers

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Cast

George A. Custer

Marcello Mastroianni

Marie-Hélène de Boismonfrais

Catherine Deneuve

Buffalo Bill

Michel Piccoli

Gen. Terry

Philippe Noiret

Mitch

Ugo Tognazzi

The CIA agent

Paolo Villaggio

The Mad Indian

Serge Reggiani

Sitting Bull

Alain Cuny

The Reporter (uncredited)

Marco Ferreri

Tom (as Franco Fabrizzi)

Franco Fabrizi

Rayon de Lune (as Franca Bettoja)

Franca Bettoia

Government Official

Daniele Dublino

The youngsters Folcacchio and Guffardo must bring an embassy to the Bishop of Volterra, and during the trip, the two boys meet the beautiful Gemmata. The woman is a poor peasant who is married to Nicholas. Folcacchio and Guffardo, to have a night of love with the girl, pretends to be magicians who can turn humans into beasts.

6.6

Don't Lose Your Head

Mar 2, 1967

Amidst the French revolution, Citizen Robespierre is beheading the aristocracy! When word gets to England, noblemen Sir Rodney Ffing and Lord Darcy Pue take it upon themselves to aid their French counterparts. Sir Rodney is a master of disguise, and becomes 'The Black Fingernail' scourge of Camembert and Bidet, leaders of the French secret police.

6.5

Carry On Doctor

Dec 2, 1967

Francis Bigger, a notorious charlatan who tours the country lecturing on the subject of mind over matter, slips off the platform in the middle of his performance and ends up in hospital under the care of Dr Tinkle. The hospital is about to enter a period of total chaos.

4.5

Custer's Last Stand

Jan 2, 1936

Kit Cardigan seeks the killer of his father...among other plot threads leading up to the famous historical incident.

7.3

The Ladykillers

Dec 8, 1955

Five oddball criminals planning a bank robbery rent rooms on a cul-de-sac from an octogenarian widow under the pretext that they are classical musicians.

7.2

Withnail & I

Jun 19, 1987

Two out-of-work actors -- the anxious, luckless Marwood and his acerbic, alcoholic friend, Withnail -- spend their days drifting between their squalid flat, the unemployment office and the pub. When they take a holiday "by mistake" at the country house of Withnail's flamboyantly gay uncle, Monty, they encounter the unpleasant side of the English countryside: tedium, terrifying locals and torrential rain.

6.9

Winners and Sinners

Jul 7, 1983

Five friends are released from prison and do their best to stay out trouble. While trying to mind their own business (and run their 5-Star Cleaning Service), they are caught up in a war between rival Triad gangs fighting for control of the counterfeit currency market.

5.8

Carry On Dick

Feb 1, 1974

Dick Turpin is terrorising the countryside around Upper Dencher. Captain Fancey and Sergeant Jock Strapp plan to put an end to his escapades, and enlist the help of the Reverend Flasher. Little do they know that the priest leads a double life. Then Madame Desiree and her "Birds of Paradise" arrive in the village...

5.7

Carry On Girls

Nov 9, 1973

Local councillor Sidney Fiddler persuades the Mayor to help improve the image of their rundown seaside town by holding a beauty contest. But formidable Councillor Prodworthy, head of the local women's liberation movement, has other ideas. It's open warfare as the women's lib attempt to sabotage the contest.

6.1

Carry On Cruising

Mar 12, 1962

Captain Crowther's lot is not a happy one! Five of his crew have to be replaced and at such short notice before the voyage begins there isn't much to choose from. Not only does he get the five most incompetent shipmates ever to sail the seven seas, but the passengers turn out to be a rather strange bunch too. The SS Happy Wanderer will never be the same.

5.9

Carry On Jack

Feb 23, 1964

Able seaman Poop-Decker signs up for adventure on the high seas with the wicked Captain Fearless. Those swabbing the decks include Juliet Mills, Charles Hawtrey and Donald Houston. The film was originally to be titled Up the Armada, but the British Board of Film Censors objected to such a rude title.

6.4

Carry On Spying

Jun 1, 1964

Carry On favourite Barbara Windsor makes her debut in this outrageous send-up of the James Bond movies. Fearless agent Desmond Simpkins and Charlie Bind, aided and abetted by the comely Agent Honeybutt and Agent Crump, battle against the evil powers of international bad guys STENCH and their three cronies.

7.0

Omaha (The Movie)

Apr 28, 1995

From the co-founder of Slamdance comes the story of a young man who returns home from a trip abroad to confront not just his peculiar family and friends, but also a pair of Colombian jewel thieves and a roving gang of Iowa kickboxers, culminating in a showdown at Carhenge. A seminal movie in the history of independent film, "Omaha: The Movie" was the film that spearheaded the birth of the Slamdance Film Festival.

6.9

Le Million

Feb 4, 1931

Debt-ridden painter Michel is overcome with joy at discovering that he has just won 1 million florins in the Dutch lottery, but almost immediately, he discovers that his softhearted girlfriend, Béatrice, has given away his jacket containing the winning ticket to an elderly petty thief. Soon Michel, Beatrice and Michel's artistic rival, Prosper, are hurtling through the streets of Paris on the trail of the missing jacket.

7.1

The Gunfighter

Mar 21, 2014

In the tradition of classic westerns, a narrator sets up the story of a lone gunslinger who walks into a saloon. However, the people in this saloon can hear the narrator and the narrator may just be a little bit bloodthirsty.

7.3

Daisies

Dec 30, 1966

Two teenage girls embark on a series of destructive pranks in which they consume and destroy the world around them.

4.4

Oh Dad, Poor Dad, Mamma's Hung You in the Closet and I'm Feeling So Sad

Feb 15, 1967

A woman brings her son and husband to a tropical vacation spot for a little rest and relaxation. The only problem is that the husband has been dead for quite some time, and his wife had him stuffed and carries him everywhere with her. Complications ensue.

5.8

Any Wednesday

Oct 13, 1966

Ellen Gordon, a New York executive's mistress falls for the executive's young business associate when the young man is accidentally sent to use the apartment where the executive and his mistress get together every Wednesday. More complications arise when the executive's wife shows up with plans to redecorate the apartment.

6.2

Bedtime Story

Jun 10, 1964

Benson is a Casanova who tricks women into having sex with him before leaving them. He is content with this game until he meets Jamison, a real operator who poses as an exiled prince and not only gets women to share his bed but also to give him money to help him fund his supposed counter-revolution.